Monday, November 5, 2012

How to survive the fraud?

Every healthy relationship is based on trust, because things will go back to only when it reappears trust

It is said that you can fix a broken vase but the glue will always see. This may be true for glass or ceramics, but they do something else. The truth is that once the affair happens you can not expect things to return to "normal" overnight, but many couples are able to overcome this problem, get over the pain of adultery and insulted happily continue their life together.

If you are the one who cheated and tries to forgive their partner's infidelity, if you are the one who have cheated and got caught, but I do not want to lose a partner or if you know someone who may need advice on this situation for maybe just a little help of our tips .. .

First Think carefully about the situation

The cheater has to decide if he loved her enough partners to do everything possible to save the relationship. Cheating is a complete betrayal of trust a person who loves you and it would be foolish to expect that he will say, "Okay, I forgive you. Did purchased the shampoo that I asked for?". It will take a lot of effort and sacrifice. And if you're on the other side of the story and you have been cheated, then I know how you feel now. And, believe me, hide it and pretend you do not care is totally wrong. Do not keep the pain to myself, prefer a good cry. Once you throw it out you'll be able to think rationally and decide if you want it back or not.

Second Enter the heart of the problem

Talking about the things that your partner or lead you to a fake is not easy, but it's the only way.Well, I think that most of my failed relationships failed because I prefer problems "sweep under the rug" and pretend that all is well. It's definitely an easier way, but this just leads to further and even greater trouble. Try to know about the problems and find solutions for them. Just so you can start over again.

3rd Forget the words and focus on work

"I love you" is really meant something before episodes of cheating, but now, frankly, is not worth nothing. So if you're the one who cheated on you, find another way to show and prove their love and back again on your credibility. But if you're a fraud, expect the same. I do not give a "pull" back in connection with material things, precious gift (You'd be amazed how many women "fall" in this forums). This does not guarantee long-term happiness.

4th And forgive, or overlook it, or move on

Your partner is cheating on you, you've talked a lot about it and have decided to move on and try to maintain that connection. Congratulations on what you give people a second chance and you want to stay in touch. But jealousy and lack of trust in the future will be difficult. So be sure that, once you forgive your partner and you both learn a lesson, this ugly "episode" in your relationship look like part of the past, not that he was constantly reproaches. Your partner should help by working hard to regain your trust, and you in turn should be open to his efforts. So, do not give in too quickly, but I also do not like all great mistake to use it as an excuse for your jealous outbursts, insults, or to keep him "tour under your nose."

5th Re-ignite the flames of old love

Think about the old times, the good times and the things that you have merged and strengthened as a couple, and now try to re-live those moments. Start going out together again - for dinner, to the movies, go camping, hiking or whatever, but what they both enjoy. One of the most common reasons cheating is feeling stuck and routines. If you do not want to return to the old - go completely over. Do something you have never before and give yourself a chance to fall in love again.

6th Do not be vindictive

Revenge is never a solution and you will not feel better if your partner back "tit for tat". If you've decided to honestly work on that connection then do it, and it's not muted.

7th Work on trust

Every healthy relationship is based on trust, because things will go back to only when it reappears confidence. It may take several years to get the relationship back to the condition it was in before the "unfortunate incident". And sometimes it happens that you realize that there's no way that you will ever be able to trust the person again. Then, however, should have the power and go. And sometimes it needs as much power as it is to stay.

Everyone knows himself best. Some people are willing to give others a second chance, others cost more confidence than anything else, and when they lose it they know that there is no chance of it ever returning. What do you think? Have you ever been in a situation where you have cheated or been cheated? How did you react and what would you advise these people?

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