Friday, November 16, 2012

True and false friends


Where is the thin boundary between the real and fake friendships, and do you know who your true friends and true?

What would you have done to your friends? Would you lie, cheat, forgive unforgivable, suffered, sacrificed ...? As with all things, there must be a limit, but where is it located? This question she asked me my dear friend the other day on the morning coffee. Somewhat taken aback, I sought to explain what bothers her.


I always knew her best friend from college, to be a few good times we zaružili together at parties, and soups and tablets for treating headache the next day hangover. When I remembered those times, appeared to be a smile on my face. Them over the years I lost touch since he moved to his home town, while my friends often went to visit him and I even teased her that one day marry him. This was just shaking her hand with a short answer, "You can dream."

That morning I found out one side of their friendship that I had not even suspected to exist.
- I have long suspected, in fact I know that there are tendencies towards men, but somehow it was not for our friendship was important. When we left, we spent a great, I went to his parents for lunch and we always jokingly say that we're a couple. At least I'm telling a joke. His parents were always good to me, but according to him have always been pretty strict and cold, so I have always protected the little lies of his parents. He was often heard to say that he went to me for a few days, I was his alibi. But it was all fine until yesterday, when his father called me and asked me if his son spent the weekend with me. At that moment, when he called me I was barely befallen him and said that I can not talk now, and I'm in a meeting and will call him later. I immediately called a friend and asked him what in me into?He began to clown the parents said that he was with me, and then he was allegedly seen by family friends with the other, in a completely different place, and that they now had a fight and just tell his parents that he was with me - mourned friend.

- What do I do? I do not want to lie so his parents. So for them I spent days and weeks, and food for their table. I was pampered and looked after. They can not do it. On the other hand, if you tell them that he was not with me, I'll lose a friend. Or maybe you've already lost to his distrust of me? - I asked my friend.


Confidence friend

So where is the thin boundary between the real and fake friendships? Definitely lies in the confidence of those who believe friends. Without that there is no friendship.

When a friend of my friends decided not to entrust their little secret to one of the closest people in his life, that was probably the end of his friendship, and it just might not he, were not aware of. Although she has always known about his preferences, that it did not interfere one bit to be his best friend possible, he just used that friendship for a secret life in which she had no access to, nor is it supposed to know about it. Of course, there is hardly a person who does not have any skeletons in the closet or the laundry that at least tries to hide it, but true friends always knew in trouble, not only in good times.

Many people derive from their friends all the positive energy from their loyalty and turned it into something negative. Then, and this friendship turns into something negative. Exploiting friends just to give you the benefit when you need them, and does not give anything in return is a way that no happy ending. True friendship must be sincere, honest and loyal. What is the receiving and giving.Friendship is love, that there is no secret of life, unspoken truths, lies, deception ...

Truth liberates

What is then done my friend? Frankly talked with a friend and told him to know his biggest secret, that she knew for a long time and that he still loves you as a friend, but you can not lie to him. Is it true liberation? It is probably from a very poor friend, who was not worth it.

- I know that not one or the other was not until the end honest with each other, but it seemed to me to be a part of the "untruths" I just correct myself, but to us only in further dragged into yet more lies and untruths. Now, when you think about it, I think it was a bad friend, all he wanted from me, but nothing is given. I did not realize how burdened me for so long until I was faced with a serious problem because of it. Then I sat down and thought about everything well. I know that none of us is perfect, but for each of their friends have always been ready to do even one more step, and even the sacrifices imposed on a few small lies, to protect him ... And I am now ready to do that because I believe that's what friends are for - explained the friend the next day.

After our conversation, I again remembered from our college days when our friendship seemed somehow easier and neobaveznije. While we have our pranks and adventures going through my head, again I laughed to herself. I was happy! Because I know that I have at least one good friend. And that is truly a wealth!

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